From retail jobs to foster parents in their 30s

Chloe Hughes
BBC News, West Midlands
Mike and Andy Two men are stranding in front of a harbour with boats in the water. The man on the left has white blonde hair and is wearing sunglasses, a black top and beige shirt over the top. The man on the right is wearing a blue cap with a green/grey t-shirt and blue and white striped shirt on top.Mike and Andy
Mike and Andy started fostering about nine years ago

Nine years ago, Mike and Andy were working jobs in retail which left them in a "cycle of nothingness".

The couple, from Birmingham, wanted to experience family life. They decided to start fostering children.

They were 30 and 33 - significantly younger than the UK fostering average of 54.

Andy and Mike now foster full-time and have been sharing the rewards and challenges of their role. They are parents to a teenage girl and boy from different families - two of the nearly 12,000 children in care in the West Midlands as of January 2024.

Mike said they had helped the children form a strong sibling bond.

"The dynamic between the two of them is brilliant," he said.

"They're just like siblings – they'll argue, call each other names, and then, the next minute, they're holding hands around the shopping centre."

Getty Images A small child is sitting on a chair. They are wearing a white top with yellow and blue hearts on it. They are wearing white, pink and blue leggings and are holding a blue bear on her lapGetty Images
In January 2024, there were nearly 12,000 children in care in the West Midlands, according to the government

Andy and Mike believe their role is to help foster children overcome "unimaginable circumstances".

Before she moved in, their foster daughter had seven homes in 12 months.

She has now been with Andy and Mike for five years, and will stay until she is at least 18. She was a bridesmaid at their wedding.

Andy said fostering without any preconceived parenting ideas had made the experience enjoyable.

"Some parents can find it challenging because foster children have had very different early experiences to their own children, and they have to learn to navigate trauma and complex emotions," he said.

'They bring joy to our lives'

The couple said they believed there were myths over fostering which deterred young people from inquiring about it.

"Fostering is a way of life, and we see these children as our own, but it's important other people know that you are financially supported when you foster," said Andy.

"We do a lot of training, learning, and admin while caring for the children around the clock.

"You can also still go to work and foster at the same time, and you can foster if you happen to rent your home."

Mike added: "We see the admin side of things, like the training and daily logs as work, but the rest of the time, they're just our children.

"Sometimes it's really hard, but you don't give up on your own children.

"They're part of our family and our life now, they bring so much joy and energy to our lives."

Children in care by area

  • Birmingham and Black Country: 4,808
  • Coventry: 724
  • Herefordshire: 412
  • Shropshire and Telford & Wrekin: 1,109
  • Staffordshire and Stoke-on-Trent: 2,491
  • Warwickshire: 778
  • Wolverhampton: 501
  • Worcestershire: 1,000

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