'Love-bombing' signs highlighted by charity

A charity is warning people about the practice of love-bombing - which involves showering a partner with excessive gifts and attention in an attempt to control them.

City of York Council and local charities said perpetrators may use events such as Valentine's Day to manipulate their victims.

Kyra Women's Project has highlighted the practice of love-bombing as part of a wider campaign around domestic abuse.

Molly Charnock leads a recovery group with the charity in York to support female victims of domestic abuse and said that love-bombing can leave victims "feeling confused, exhausted and isolated".

She said excessive gifts or declarations of love were "often used around days like Valentine's Day to smooth things over or to make you feel like things are getting better" in an abusive relationship.

"This can be early signs of abuse, or a 'red flag'. But this can also be used as 'reconciliation' in a cycle of abuse," Ms Charnock said.

It is estimated that 4,000 people in York are currently experiencing domestic abuse, with a further 16,000 residents having experienced it at some point in their lives.

Domestic abuse is one of the leading causes of homelessness locally and nationally, according to Government figures.

"In many cases, women are financially dependent on their abuser, and they fear they and their children will become homeless and destitute, so they put up with abuse," Ms Charnock said.

"The first step though is crucial: getting out of an abusive situation is key to enable people to heal and rebuild their lives."

City of York council has launched an initiative that will enable victims of domestic abuse to access support from the authority without having to go to the police first.

People who approach the council for help receive help to stay in or leave their homes safely, depending on their circumstances, under the domestic abuse residents and tenants policy.

Council housing staff will also be trained to spot the signs of domestic abuse and respond appropriately, a spokesperson for the authority said.

Councillor Michael Pavlovic, executive member for housing, planning and safer communities, told a meeting that the policy aimed to tackle a culture of victims not being believed unless they had reported abuse to the police, according to the Local Democracy Reporting Service.

Pavlovic said: "There's still a stigma around this and a level of under-reporting, and we're aware of how difficult it is for victims to report domestic abuse.

"Victims often take the leap to say they need to get out of a relationship, but they can't because they aren't in control of their finances and they're going to lose control of their homes and their lives.

"We need to move to a culture where our first port of call is to believe victims."

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